{"id":343,"date":"2013-11-12T19:26:06","date_gmt":"2013-11-12T19:26:06","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.joycejuster.com\/thoughts\/?p=343"},"modified":"2013-11-25T01:18:36","modified_gmt":"2013-11-25T01:18:36","slug":"healthy-boundaries","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.joycejuster.com\/thoughts\/?p=343","title":{"rendered":"Healthy Boundaries"},"content":{"rendered":"

Characteristics of Healthy Boundaries<\/span><\/strong>, by Charles Whitfield, MD<\/p>\n

\"Saying_No\"<\/p>\n

    \n
  1. Presence<\/i><\/b>\u2014to have boundary health, and to sense the usefulness or non-usefulness of a boundary, a boundary has to be present in my awareness to some degree.\u00a0 IF it is not present in my awareness, then I may not be able to set it or, if I choose, to let it go.<\/li>\n
  2. Appropriateness<\/i><\/b>\u2014based on my inner life.\u00a0 This begins to delineate some useful reasons why I may need the boundary. I set the boundary or let it go based on what I am experiencing right now in my inner life.\u00a0 My inner life includes my beliefs, thoughts, feelings, decisions, choices, wants, needs, intuitions and more.\u00a0 So, knowing what is coming up for me in my life is crucial in my setting healthy boundaries and having healthy relationships.<\/li>\n
  3. Protective<\/i><\/b>\u2014the boundary is useful to help protect the well-being and integrity of my child within.<\/li>\n
  4. Clarity<\/i><\/b>\u2014I am clear about the boundary with myself and with others with whom I am setting the boundary or limit.<\/li>\n
  5. Firmness<\/i><\/b>\u2014to get what I want or need, how firm do I want my boundary or limit to be?\u00a0 I am in charge of how firm I want them to be.<\/li>\n
  6. Maintenance<\/i><\/b>\u2014do I need to maintain or hold firm on a specific boundary or limit for a period of time to get what I need or want?\u00a0 OR do I need to relax the boundary or limit to get what I want or need?<\/li>\n
  7. Flexibility<\/i><\/b>\u2014to get what I want or need, how flexible do I want my boundary or limit to be?\u00a0 To have healthy boundaries, I need to also be flexible\u2014when appropriate for my healthy, individual human needs and wants.\u00a0 To have healthy relationships, I may need to let go of my boundaries and limits when appropriate.<\/li>\n
  8. Receptive<\/i><\/b>\u2014would it be useful or enjoyable for me to loosen the boundary a bit and let another person, place, thing, behavior or experience it?<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    \"In_My_Heart\"<\/p>\n

     <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    Characteristics of Healthy Boundaries, by Charles Whitfield, MD Presence\u2014to have boundary health, and to sense the usefulness or non-usefulness of a boundary, a boundary has to be present in my awareness to some degree.\u00a0 IF it is not present in my awareness, then I may not be able to set it or, if I choose, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-343","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-psychology"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.joycejuster.com\/thoughts\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/343","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.joycejuster.com\/thoughts\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.joycejuster.com\/thoughts\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.joycejuster.com\/thoughts\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.joycejuster.com\/thoughts\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=343"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/www.joycejuster.com\/thoughts\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/343\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":346,"href":"http:\/\/www.joycejuster.com\/thoughts\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/343\/revisions\/346"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.joycejuster.com\/thoughts\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=343"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.joycejuster.com\/thoughts\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=343"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.joycejuster.com\/thoughts\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=343"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}